When it comes to choosing a companion to share your life with, keep some special aspects in focus.
Choose someone who shares their thoughts and emotions with you and you with them without fear of judgement or being made fun of.
Choose someone with whom you never have to second guess what they are thinking vs what they are saying because both of you have opened your hearts and minds and kept your egos aside and there are no secrets.
Choose someone that you can pour all the love in your soul into and receive as much if not more back in return.
Choose someone who loves you and respects you for who you are when they find you and not for who you might have the potential to become in the future and vice versa. The future is unseen and the Almighty is the only one who can predict your future self and potential. You do not build your life on predictions.
Choose someone that will fill some of the gap with love when I leave you so you never feel alone.
And when you find someone that good, then you pray to the Almighty for mercy and in making the path easy because nothing in life is easy unless the Almighty ordains it to be.
No matter how much respect and love the people have for each other, there will always be conflicts.
Choose someone that is humble and fears the Almighty and surrenders their ego in order to resolve their conflicts with you and you do the same.
Choose someone you can enjoy having your favorite meals with so you can share and have half the calories 😊
Choose someone that may not listen to the same music and read the same books but is open to trying everything new out with you as long as it doesn't make them sick 😊
Choose someone that you WANT to come home to and share your boring day with, down to what you ate and how many times you went to the bathroom because they're your best friend and it all matters to them because you matter and vice versa.
And remember that a life requires as much effort as a job or studies or whatever project you ever undertake. It requires management and milestones and mutual alignment and planning and both parties have to exercise patience and forbearance because humans mess up all the time and need to be forgiven.
Remember that forgiveness is a trait owned by the Almighty. It is not found in humans in abundance. Choose someone YOU have the capacity to forgive and who has the capacity to forgive you because you will both make mistakes, both big and small and forgiveness will be the only way forward towards harmony.
Choose someone the thought of whom brings peace to your heart and soul. Peace is more important than excitement.
Choose someone as good as your nana and your Abu. Everyone has flaws. People forget things. They don't buy flowers and chocolate. They can't eat your favorite foods. But if they pick you up when you're down and are there when it really matters then all the cosmetic stuff is inconsequential. The real stuff is them respecting you, your parents and family in equal measure as you respect theirs.
And always choose the right path to the Almighty and choose to make yourself the best human soul before you try to add someone to your life. Your journey is the most important one. It spells the difference between a life lived with meaning and ending with a beautiful hereafter vs a life left struggling to figure out what someone else is thinking and forgetting that there is the Almighty to also worry about because heaven and hell are decided in the balance of your everyday lives, not in a singular moment. It's not one exam. It's a collection of daily tests of our patience, our ability to be respectful and loving to those around us and our inner drive to make the world a better place for everyone we come across.
Remember you have more love from the Almighty and your parents than you will ever get from anyone you could choose. The Almighty loves us the most and as a consequence of this love when we are born we already have the people that will love us the mostest with us - no one is humanly capable of loving you more and be willing to do more for you than your mother and father and that is a constant and a blessing from the day you are born to the day they pass from this earth. And once they pass and you have been blessed with siblings, then you still have the Almighty's love and blessings with you.
I love you - from your first breath to my last. And Allah SWT loves you.
Think hard and ask yourself if you actually need any more than this at any point in your life. Everyone else is the icing. You already have the cake my dearest child.
Forever and always
Ami
