slightly misty winter days...

Its true really.. my blogs really do sound like a weather report sometimes.

This morning was amazing.. it was soft and misty.. lahore is still in the middle ground between fall and winter.. winter hasnt struck with a vengeance as yet.. i carry around my oversized Nike jacket anyway ... Just in case :)

My head throbs a wee bit.. in a funny way.. my eyes i fear will very soon give up on me i stare at nothing but a huge lcd screen alllllll day.. its sad i tell you..

I have however learned to type without looking at the keyboard which is a real cool accomplishment. :)

I seriously have regressed into ultra boring zone. The reason is as follows: Lack of honesty. I've lost the streak of letting loose on the web without fear of recrimination. :) i dunno. Maybe it'll come back.. but i seriously only work and sleep so i dont have much to say..

Just had a new bundle of joy enter our familial fold.. my cousin just had a baby boy... 6 pounds 11 ounces.. :) MashAllah.. lots of joy going around.. The birth of a baby is always a reason for joy.. its so pure and untainted.. i hope every birth is safe and joyful..

I have constant companions in my workplace.. my window (if u can call it that) faces outward onto the side of our building.. each afternoon the cooks for the offices below cook their gleeful little hearts out, having merry conversation in punjabi as they go about their work... its a nice indirect companionship.. :) you never feel alone..

It was my daddys birthday yesterday... cakes n flowers...

Im a little disturbed still with my ongoing internal struggle with the outside world. I know that sounds a bit confusing but i dont know how else to put it. Inside my heart i firmly believe that nothing and no one else matters in my life except the Almighty and those that i bestow my love on. My sense of self is strong and so is my faith. Apart from my inner sanctum of my nearest and dearest, I dont give a rats ass about other peoples opinions, thoughts, and general verbal expression.. and thats the way it will remain.

You can insulate yourself, but how do you insulate those who you love. Not everyone will think like me. Theres a reason why our closest friends and family are on the same wave length as us. Its a defensive strategy. People dont like exposing themselves to what they dont like and hence they chose to love only like minded people to have minimal disruption in their lives.

Somehow very few people are able to insulate themselves from being affected by the random opinions of all and sundry.. we have so many situation where inevitably someone ends up uttering.. hai Allah log kya sochien gey.. kya sochien gey?.. can you control it.. can you remotely direct it... do you think if you're a goody two shoes and a Allah ki gai for your entire life the world will leave you alone...

Bull Shit.. they'll come after you tenfold. The world in general likes an easy target. It doesnt pay to be nice to everyone..
But i cant be ruthless either... just uncaring..

i believe in letting things be.. big Paul Mcartney fan there....
Allah mian takes care of most of my issues.. but thats just me.. some people out there need to tackle each issue head on and make sure the issue knows it exists..

my approach can sometimes be likened to the ostrich. which is not good. i ramble. which is also not good. i go now.. :)

see ya..

Princess of the GemWorld


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I dare to dream... so sue me.. :p
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