brrrrrr.... damn!

Yeah... so its like they say... don't complain about God's weather forecast... coz he just might decide to oblige you... brrrr... *shivering, huddled in front of the LCD screen...

My frozen fingers move slowly across the keyboard painfully pounding out each alphabet... seriously i mean.. look at me!... tshirt, sweatshirt, woolen tracks, socks, and a razai... and i'm STILL freezing... Pity the people who are at the moment surrounded by snow... yeesh... I think going to hell will be relatively easy as long as its not cold.. or maybe sooo cold that you just fall asleep thanks to hypothermia...
reminds me of the "Is hell endothermic or exothermic" email.. :) its an old favorite of mine..

i think i'm hungry but im not sure.. i think its the cold talking rather than my tummy..
all the phones in my house are engaged.. i think my family talks too much :) ... its really funny.. i use the phone the least, and at the end of each month my dad still makes it a point to come to me and tell me the phone bill for the landline... to which my standard response is, was that the bill for my line.. to which his standard response is, i havent gotten the bill for that yet ... :)

That new indian movie "Rules" is playing in the background... its got a few nice songs.. and a few good rules ;) ... who gives anyhow... Lifes not lived by rules anyhow... its lived with passion and faith... thats it.

I was talking to a very nice gentleman yesterday... a seasoned journalist.. my greatest source of respect for him arises from the fact that inspite of the temptations of a corporate 9 to 5 semi-secure employment, he stuck to his guns and followed his dreams of writing for a living... i hope one day he completely loses his fear of standing by his written word. :) Honesty is a precious commodity in todays overly superficial world... it should be protected with something akin to the endangered species act...

I always wondered how people define "success" & "successful".. the definitions of "ambition", "drive" & "high flyer" always seem to escape me... especially since my definition of "success" is centered around a 3-syllable word... "Happiness"...
If you're happy in 80% of your living breathing moments, you're a success and let no man(woman, child, dog.. etc. ) tell you otherwise...

:) Ever since Siraj bhai told me i had the fame line on my palm... which is something he also told 5 other people i know... i realized that "fame" is a highly relative term... it depends on how your own mind interprets it... because simply put, the lines on your palm are representative of your own individual state of mind and not on any divine plan chalked out by Allah Almighty... Its a map of how YOU see your life proceeding, how YOU plan to live it, what YOU anticipate... and because of that the map on your palm lends it self to future interpretation since what you plan today will impact your tomorrow..

But see.. the lines dont factor in God :) and Allah Mians immense sense of humor.. Hence the expression "The best laid plans of Mice and Men"... He simply smiles and slowly whirls the circumstances of the best planned life into a colorful kleidescope which doesnt look anything like the nice symmetrical representation of the original blueprint. Planning seems like such a futile exercise dont you think :)...
Thats why i try not to plan anything too long term on the personal front.. Theres no point... Life is like being suspended like a pendulum in gale force winds.. Its up to the Almighty to decide which way to swing us... I just pray no matter which direction i am sent in next, I am happy and content.... Nothing too ambitious... but its a hell of a lot of work...

Suns out... it seems like its baking the balcony but my room still remains as cool as a cucumber... The power of the Shadow is incredible isnt it... It has the power to protect you from the wrath of the raging sun ... something as simple and innocuous as a shadow... boggles the mind..

The word "boggles" makes me think of "muggles" which makes me think of Harry Potter... i wish the next book would come.. and i wish to God she still remembers that shes writing a CHILDREN's BOOK... i hate having people dying and emotions riding high.. sheesh... Jeffery Archer puts one through less of an emotional roller coaster than JK Rowling these days...

ok :) time to wake up and brave the elements... no one got anywhere by sitting in a razai... I think * quizzical expression... must research that.. If i find something there, it could be a gold mine ;)

Cheers y'all

Princess of the GemWorld

*****************************************************
I dare to dream... so sue me.. :p
GemWorld

Copyright © Fars - FS 2004

Shopping!! Rainy Days & Blue Moods

Hallelujah me lovelies... and here i am once again.. back from the land of SHOPPING and DISCOUNTS.. namely the Dubai Shopping Festival. Talk about cool :)

It was nice.. the first day we spent working. Atleast in the first half... ahem the second half i'll refrain from elaborating ... hehehe... i have proof people would pay good money to destroy... took some very nice shots... lets just say it was a very rhythmic evening ;)... and i mean Rhythm in every sense of the word ... The Dhow cruise was fun... good food... good company... good ... well... rhythm :) ... ahem.. Food, Drink & Music... thats the life! ... Dont go getting any ideas from the photographic proof now :) it was all quite innocent ;)

Any who... the next 2 days were spent in leisure.. i hit the city centre with a vengeance.. spent a very highly productive 4 hours in watching the final chapter of the Lord of the Rings trilogy. That movie ROCKS... i was in an emotionally wrougth state throughout... practically bawling like a baby from start to finish.. the whole man triumphing over nature and really bad ass evil was a very emotionally charged experience... my favorite scene was the grand scale lighting of the beacons of Gondor for Rohans help.... oooooof.... Unbelievable..!!..
salt water rolled freely down my cheeks as i wept in joy at the unity of man and brotherhood triumphing over years of bad blood..
and thats when it hit me... they were all from a fictional time and place.. makes you think dont it... hell!.. fiction is better then reality any day of the week... MUST WATCH movie..

My must-do checklist didnt see too much of a deviation. I had my Starbucks Caramel Machiato ... twice... Had the Cinnabon Applebon... too huge to finish even during the 4 hour epic.. and my standard Burger King Junior Whopper.. hold the onions..
After that checklist was fulfilled... i found my self at a bit of a loss as to what to do next, so i went off to wait by the Ikea fountain for my friends to pick me up. In the meanwhile i managed to have my Blood Sugar and pressure checked by the doctors from GSK sitting there... 103 & 110/70... exceedingly normal.. also had my eye sight checked... -0.25 on the left and -0.75 or so on the right... Long distance vision slightly impaired.. the guy asked if i had headaches.. i said no.. so he said in that case you dont need glasses...

Then my friends picked me up and we headed to the global village.. :) its alot of fun.... reminded me of the Disney World Epcot Centre and the different country stalls... Pakistan was cool.. had a Nirala Sweets and a TCS :)... Saw some nice stalls... the Egyptian one had really nice pickles, olives and cheeses... the Italian one.. was *swoon... filled with... ahem... Gladiators (in reeeeaally short skirts) and Masquerade Masks... which were bee-yoo-tee-ful..

We walked alot ... and finally the crowning glory of the evening was a Hardees Five Star Burger... which and i'm actually daring to say this... beats the BK Whopper Hollow.... yummmmmy....

:) as you can see... the whole trip was very highly food centric... Didnt do so much shopping. Exercised massive amounts of self control. I surprise myself sometimes...

Came home and died.. the immigration line had 8 flights converge on it on our arrival.. took us two hours just to make it out alive.... the scene was something akin to the Stick Figure Death Theatre ... so you can well imagine.... more than 200 people who'd been up randomly for more than 24 hours... arriving at 4am in the morning and standing in a line that literally "CRAWLED" for 2 hours... need i say more .... *shivers run down spine... its not an experience i'd wish on my relatively second worst enemy.

ok dearies... this blogs been along time coming... i'm signing off and going to work... cant think straight... my minds all mush...
cheerios

Princess of the GemWorld

*****************************************************
I dare to dream... so sue me.. :p
GemWorld

Copyright © Fars - FS 2004

And thats why they call it... winters!?!!!

Damn talk about short... (no no.. all short ppl of my acquaintance.. this wasnt aimed at any of you :) ...
The winters!... the damn things finished before we could go brrr!.. i mean theres a limit to how "short term" God Almighty makes something. Two weeks hardly qualifies as a season.

I got to wear a sweater for ONE week.. ONE WEEK in FREAKING DECEMBER!! and even then people in office looked at me funny. My boss is running his Air conditioner. I dont blame him. Its actually required right now.

Im sitting here poring over excel sheets and powerpoint files and thinking... "lifes like that" ... hmm.. Avril lavigne.. Complicated ... the girls got the right idea there...

Random thoughts on a random day.. this is what happens when a blog has to sit and fester throughout the day without any attention from the blogger.. i mean check it out. Its not even funny..

nothing depletes human energy like an excel sheet gnawing on the edges of your conciousness.... aaaarrrghhh... where are the good old days... when we DIDNT have computers... and we didnt have MS windows.. and we didnt have this incessant urge to communicate... aaarrrgggghhh... *elctrostatic hair being pulled ferociously

yeah ok.. im ok now.. *frantically flattening down hair ...
Like is all very cloak and dagger like.. :) every so often you turn your head just in time to avoid a soft swish from a razer sharp samurai blade..
Life is full of near misses... with misfortune, with unhappiness, with death...
its these brushes with the negative which make the positive worthy of appreciation.

Considering my current level of achievement in the sense of the hereafter is nothing to write home about... but i harbor a weird, slightly unsettling resignation to the ultimate bye bye.. lol... yeah i know its a bit morose but :) hey... remember the boy scouts ... "Be Prepared" i always say... ( i dont :) but what the heck :) ... And since we're all talking death n destruction .. (well im talking, y'all are listening)... anyone of you with an afinity for the gory :) and well "fresh brains on white carpets" kind of urges MUST check out this site .... Stick Figure Death Theatre ... lol .. i went searching for death and thought i'd find something serious and heres what i ended up with ... *rolling on floor laughing...

ok now i've crossed the borderline between dangerously obsessed & Certifiable!!... *evil grin >:>

I know quite a few certifiable cases. Its weird the kind of obsessions my friends have.. I am amazed when i state "my friends" in the same statement as "weird" and "obsessions"... Theres something definitely wrong here... heheheh

well.. lets see... some of the relatively exceptable ones are as follows:
ones obsessed with shoes (regular imelda marcos in the making :) ...
ones obsessed with death sticks (the smoking variety)...
ones obsessed with cars and alternative bands...
ones obsessed with food... (uh noo.. wait ... that would be me)
ones obsessed with computers (including any and all peripherals) [technomania - craze for technology ]
ones obsessed with sleeping (in large lethal doses) [clinomania - excessive desire to stay in bed ]
ones obsesses with sharp objects ( Daggers, Samurai Swords... i mean theres got to be a word for this... a lethal psychotic word.. ) [dacnomania - obsession with killing ]

Well u know what.. i went to the Phobia list indexed by Fears ... makes for an interesting diagnostic read... oooh... Dr. A should take a look at this one ... its right up his alley... He might even be able to discontinue Consultative Diagnosis and move on to some actual factual Honest-to-God Diagnosis..

And then i realized that i actually needed to go to a Mania List lol :) so i did... oooh niiice.. this was even nicer... i can actually attach manias to all the people i know now..

I am infected by the following:
dromomania - compulsive longing for travel
epomania - craze for writing epics
graphomania - obsession with writing
scribbleomania - obsession with scribbling

lol :) i tried and tried and couldnt find a mania for shoes :)

Its like they say :) Umeed peh duniya qaim hay..

oky me darlin's

cheers

Princess of the GemWorld

*****************************************************
I dare to dream... so sue me.. :p
GemWorld

Copyright © Fars - FS 2004

Sunday Blues

No not really... ive had one helluva lazy weekend.. usually mum used to throw everyone outta their beds by 8am on any holiday and we had the family breakfast at 9 or so.. it used to be a really nice family breakfast... omelettes & toasts, sometimes parathas and fried eggs.. loads of good stuff ... its a tradition which has somehow become lost in the flurry of activity surrounding us now.

Mostly no one wants to have a heavy breakfast anymore. but its something i miss. My nana always used to say, "a family that eats together.. stays together". I can still remember all those summer vacations we spent at Nana Nanis house.. lunch and dinner used to be in nana nanis room.. with a dastarkhwan laid out in the middle of the room... all of us kids assembled together.. A/cs running (karachi summers are no joke).. the food all laid out on the trolley... and to this day i can vouch for the fact that my NANIS THE WORLDS BEST COOK...

i miss that. i miss those summers when all my cousins used to come down from everywhere... me from wherever we were posted at that time... my aunts kids from NY(3 - 2 girls n a boy).. and my uncles kids(2 boys) who lived in karachi year round.. the 6 of us went through most of our metamorphosis's together...

we were sooo dramatic.. *nostalgic smile.. We could start off playing house by making tents with nanos bedsheets and end up homeless & hungry and hunted by aliens.. Once... and i remember this vividly... we started out by using the sheets to make gowns (only the girls:) and it evolved into some black magic involving british monarchy soap opera... I KID YOU NOT.. freaking Prince Andrew was in there somewhere alongside the witches and the Hair dresser... yeah there was a hair dresser.. Apparently that was a pivotal role. I think thats where Prince Andrew came and hit on my cousin.. i recall being very happy at the prospect of having royalty in the family :)

One summer the six of us decided to launch a detective agency.. because well people really needed detective agencies y'know:)... so with lots of fanfare initially just the four of us (excluding my uncles 2 coz they had their own house in karachi, and hence were less infected with our certain brand of youthful lunacy)... lauched the Peaky Sneaky Frightening Four.. Slogan: Whenever you need us, we're at your door!

Then along came the other two and we had to induct the two new members into the agency, which kinda threw a wrench in our naming convention. Exercising great creative genius we renamed the agency "Peaky Frightening Sneaky Six". Please note the use of similarly starting alphabets on the last two words for a more melodious rendition of the brand name :)

That option however did not lend itself fluidly enough to our advertising campaign, so we went back to the drawing board and re-christened ourselves.... "The Sixers". Sounding more like a cricket team than a detective agency, but everyone was happy. We made advertising signage, employee badges, alias's were assigned, the Agency HQ had to be shifted out of the doghouse under the garage staircase to the gallery leading up to the roof.. (The doghouse had space limitations)... I believe we had one conflict that day, when one of our newly inducted members threw off his badge in a quitting fit... Major issue there.. I mean you cant be the SIXERS and only have 5 members.. then you turn into the Fivers or something... I recall having to think up alternate names "just in case" we couldnt convince our errant employee to reconsider his stance in the greater interest of the company branding.

:) we were deeply nuts... and i am happy to say, things havent changed much :)

Sighhhh... those were the Paul Family summer vacations..

* signing off now ... going to try and reinstate the family breakfast...
***MOM!!!!!!**

Princess of the GemWorld

*****************************************************
I dare to dream... so sue me.. :p
GemWorld

Copyright © Fars - FS 2004

My friend Dr. A

Hey all
Been missing in action for a bit... annual closing an all so the financial wranglings took a drain on my time quota..

Today im going to talk about my friend Dr. A. :) He's crrrrazy.. He's a recent addition to my circle of friends and he's plain crrrrrazy.. Its medical experts like him that make me fervently pray to our lord Almighty every night to grant me money, love & unebelievable amounts of Health!

A recent (relatively) med school grad, my friend Dr. A is expert in Consultative Diagnosis. E.g. if you go to him with say a sore throat and say "Hey Dr. A, i have a sore throat", he will immediately dial his friends (Read: Girls who were wayyyy smarter than him in med school) and get a correct and verified diagnosis for you. Atleast the knowledge that he's consulting women (Who we all know are wayyy more gifted in the brains department) is relatively reassuring.

He's really funny though and a carbon copy of myself. Its weird. But nice. We crack the same kinda weird ass jokes. We complain about the same kind of situations. Experientially life holds alot of parallels. But i think he's got it going real good. He just doesnt want to acknowledge it. That would mean less material to crack sarcastic, self-deprecating jokes on, which is something we do reeeeahhehehhhly well.. Its like looking in a freaking mirror and realizing... damn.. I'm not the only crazy loony person on the planet.

Self deprecation is an art. It takes people of great inner strength, great fortitude of heart and a great deal of humility to be able to abase themselves for the amusement of others. It also takes good healthy dose of reality every morning, to make you realize your failings and deficiencies and then openly exploit them to provide others with meaningless laughter. Not to mention a rocking sense of humor. My friend Dr. A is good with that. I'm good with that but to a lesser degree. I have my highs and lows. I guess there are only two ways of being good at self deprecating humor. Either you're supremely comfortable in your skin, or you're extremely aware of your own deficiencies and realize there really isnt much you can do except laugh about em. :)

But its a good thing too... :) because when you have nothing else to laugh about, well... you always have yourself.. unending fodder for infinite laughs.. and people wonder why we're always so happy :p

It takes work being happy. It takes work and it takes patience. And above all it takes a certain kind of numbing disregard for everything but your core objective : Happiness. It true that some people say happiness is not something thats attainable at any cost. Because well you know the best things in life are free. I have news for you me lovelies... "free" is a highly relative term... NOTHING is free except for maybe the air we breathe... and with the pollution these days im pretty sure theres a cost attached to that as well... OHMYGOD... You breathe... you get sick... YOU HAVE TO GO TO DOCTORS LIKE DR. A.... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..... *Holding Breath...... mmmmpppphhh..... Turning Blue.... mmmmmmppppphhhh.... Blood rushing to brain...... mmppphh... letting go of breath... whooosh...

Ok ok... so i tried... I may be risk averse... but there are certain risks one simply must face if one plans to live very long. I guess facing the medical professionals here would be one of the most dire ones... *shudder.... hehehe

But at the end of the day... Happiness is a choice you make. Its a concious effort every single moment of your life... to ensure that you remain grounded in your perception of reality... to ensure you remain disengaged from activities and emotions that can upset the delicate balance of your carefully charted route to joy. Its a continuous effort to ignore elements in your environs which work ceaselessly to fail you in your endeavor for gleeful abandon, their undending quest being to hurt you without reason... to humiliate without purpose... mere infliction of pain being their only perrogative.. and their cruel joy resides in your agony...
Don't let them win. No one can hurt you unless you let them. No one can control your life apart from the Almighty. No one can tell you what to think, eat, wear, walk, talk, write, hear... unless you let them.

Your autonomy is a gift from the Almighty. It is a gift which you should sacrifice wisely if you wish to gift it to someone in your life. It is a gift which once shared will remove a core part of you and place it in the hands of another. Be sure those hands are caring ones... be sure they wont let you fall to peices...
and be informed that this is one of the greatest risks you will ever take in your life.. its one of lifes greatest gambles.. and if it pans out, its one of lifes greatest joys.

Not everyone is lucky. And not everyone is that brave. I dont think i am.

But inspite of all my fears and feelings of inadequacy/inferiority, i AM happy. Wether the price of this happiness is high or not is a matter of perception. It requires a bit of detachment, a bit of selfishness, a bit of numbness, strategic avoidance of anything painful, requires an ability to break everything down to the basics.. and ridicule the painful when required. So far, its worked out fine..

To each his own i always say... (i may not always believe it... but i'll reserve my right to say it!)
Hmmm.. interesting wasnt it.. :)

ok :) thats all for today...

Signing off now

Princess of the GemWorld

*****************************************************
I dare to dream... so sue me.. :p
GemWorld

Copyright © Fars - FS 2004

what the... H..E... Double hockey sticks.. !!

thats it! im officially sick of the human race.. im sick of the crap i keep having to take. Im sick of the bullshit that i get thrown my way.. Im sick of living in general... aaaaarrrrrggghhh... i am certifiably SICK of the human race.
Like there isnt a single redeeming quality in this entire species as a whole. what the Almighty planned when he created this wonderful peice of treasured existence is beyond me.. But i am officially sick of it.

Officially!
SICK!
ENOUGH!
I've had it. With everyone... and everything... and everyones silly little emotional episodes regarding everything..
Its NOT MY PROBLEM.. and i dont want any part of it.
Statement #1:THE WORLD DOES NOT REVOLVE AROUND YOU ALONE... when will people realize that all of them cant be the bloody axis of the freaking universe.. that was a "Duh" statement...Like NEVER is the correct answer...
And before any of the misdirected readers of this blog think this is all about them... GET OVER YOURSELVES... and refer to statement #1.

I am so through with the world in general. Quit bothering me. Im not going to bother you either. If you need something done... fine. Let me know. If i can do it without too much botheration i'll be happy to help. Dont bother me for no reason. I dont have time for misplaced niceties. I have books to read and movies to see. Both activities being a hell of a lot more fulfilling then being around the human species...blech.

*Quick Breath.. thats it.
thats all i have to say today.
now bugger off...

Princess of the GemWorld

*****************************************************
I dare to dream... so sue me.. :p
GemWorld

Copyright © Fars - FS 2004

full of something

i was just told by someone i was entirely too full of myself.. :)
along with the insinuations that i'm off my rocker and blatant accusations that im too used to getting my own way..
I've been told im a difficult friend.. Been told worse.. been called a liar, a brat, an insensitive retard...
I've been told im high maintenance, low maintenance, too easy ... and conversely too difficult..
I've been called a social recluse.. and a social butterfly...
Too many people seem to know me, while i seem to know very few...
I've been told im too forgiving... that i can melt and forgive those undeserving of any forgiveness... I've also been told im too hard and unbending and unforgiving.. that i cut people off without any chance of redemption...
I've been told i need to be more open to opportunity and exploring options... yet I've been told to restrict myself, my thoughts, my emotions and not live life too fully...
I've been instructed to follow the path of God.. to resist human judgement.. to forsake those elements who would condemn without knowledge.... Yet i've been told to be wary of what the neighbors say and what the world thinks ... to live within the confines of what society has dictated..

I've been judged to be an individual... not a conformist.. and i've been condemned for it...
Alternatively I've been told that i try too hard to fit in .. and i should try to retain my individuality..

I've been lectured on the rights and wrongs and the "dones" and "not dones" of todays communal laws... I've been told to sacrifice and compromise in order to fit the mould of acceptability...
Conversely I've been lectured on retention of my personal convictions... on fighting for what i stand for.. on living life on my own terms and not giving in to pressures resulting from other peoples perception of what reality is or should be...

Ive been called impractical... and overly practical..
truthful to a fault... and a liar...
been accused of living on a higher plane (sarcastically so.. ) .. and been told i'm too realistic
been told i make friends too easily... been told i'm not friendly enough...
been reprimanded for trusting too easily... been accused of not trusting at all..
been told im selfish... and too selfish...
been told i take more then i give... been told i give too much to those undeserving...
been told i need to lighten up and take things as they come.. been told i need to plan everything right up to the day i am dropped 6 feet under and worry about whether i'll have someone to carry out the funeral arrangements...
Been told im perfect... been told im definitely not...
been called fat... been called normal...
been told i think too much... been told i dont think at all... should think more...
been told im lost...
been loved, hated, liked, disliked, abhorred, adored, bitched about, defended, smiled at scowled at...
been told i havent lived at all.. been told im lucky to have seen the world the way i have..
been told im nothing on my own... Believe that i am something not nothing...


well to all of the above... Yes i am (to quote Melissa Etheridge) & hanh mein houn! (to quote The Bandit Queen :)

and fortunately for the rest of pulsating humanity, its nobodys problem but mine.

Princess of the GemWorld
** Full of it .. & Lovin It... !!
*****************************************************
I dare to dream... so sue me.. :p
GemWorld

Copyright © Fars - FS 2004

its a silly sleepy day

Well waddaya know
it was an ok day to begin with.. but its progressively getting ridiculous. I have a gem of wisdom to share now...

ITS YOUR LIFE.. Live it .. if you must
and everything else is secondary... realize that human beings are inherently selfish. Even the nicest of the lot.. inherently ... theyre all selfish. and why not... since theyre surrounded by other inherently selfish human beings.. so you see at the end of the freaking day... its to each his own!!
a sentiment that ive been articulating for all sundry to hear for a past decade or so...

A gem of wiSHdom: Existence is a State of Mind..
God knows ive been expounding this philosophy for as long as i can recall having a plausibly reliable memory to depend on... now i dont have a memory.. I have a feeling it was due to me trying out the above philosophy by trying to forget
that I exist at all...

well THAT didnt work! I did however succeed in wiping out my short term memory quite definitively. Which is both a blessing :) and a curse :) :) ... Im the bane of my own existence.. in addition to being the bane of quite a few others...

I guess what it all boils down to is how far can you stand yourself... at the terminal end, you face only yourself... and God.. and well.. one of the two is going to be mighty surprised to see you...

We wake up every morning and head to our "daily lives". These lives incorporate so much within them... i must work.. i must study.. i must succeed.. i must have fun.. i must have friends.. i must love my family.. i must shower, brush, eat, sleep... i must listen to music.. i must watch tv.. i must read.. i must write.. i must talk... i must walk.. i must be neat.. i must be clean.. i must be loved.... i must love.. i must travel *counting the transit times to and from work... i must.. i must.. i must... must sleep.. must balance accounts... must pay credit card bills... must ... dear lorrrddd... whyyyyy...

At one point i was busy expounding the philosophy that theres no such thing as "Must"... this further supports my everyone is a selfish self serving bugger philosophy... (memo to me: CONTROL!)

*** Train.. Drops of Jupiter - Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken
Your best friend always sticking up for you even when I know you're wrong
Can you imagine no first dance, freeze dried romance five-hour phone conversation
The best soy latte that you ever had . . . and me ****

Some i can ... some i cant... Some i hope to.. God willing.
I dont plan on living too long. I figure i have a bunch of good years under my belt and RIGHT NOW would be a good time to bail on this rigmarole our lord blessed us with... He seems to have other plans.. plans which he's not planning to share anytime soon.. which is a bit irritating cause it throws a proverbial wrench in my annual planning cycle..
I happen to be a HIGHLY risk averse human being... unless it involves my personal well being ... or ... food. In these two cases i can be braver than the bravest and would willingly go where no man, woman, child, homosapien or living entity had even thought to tread. In wordly respects.. what i cant control, which is pretty much everything, i happen to harbor a healthy aversive fear to. So there you have it.. Im a chronically risk averse person with respect to stocks, money, & funny ass relationships.

Otherwise im fearless. I travel to new lands with nothing but a bus ticket. I navigate with a map.. and just ask every local for directions.. i dont know how this certifies to my unwavering bravery... but i figure there are a bunch of ppl who dont usually go off alone to strange countries with nothing but a bus ticket :) so yeah.. i think im brave..

Anyway.. random thoughts on a random day.. Love you allll... NOT!!.. hehehe I dont waste my love, my loves... i only have so much in me.. after that... i guess you turn into a.. an... i guess ure either empty or God fills you up with extra love.. I dunno.. i dont want to know.. I just want to have lunch now :)

Cheerios

Princess of the GemWorld


*************************************************
I dare to dream... so sue me.. :p
www.geocities.com/fariha_shah/GemWorld.html

Copyright © Fariha Shah 2004

Dear diary
oops... i meant blog... no i think i meant ppl reading blog... im confused... i dont know what i meant any more... sigh...

i lost my honesty in the name of confusion. confusion was/is simpler... it allows you to stare wide eyed at the world around you and deal with the most dire to the most innocuous of situations with a supremely ignorant "Say whaaaat.." and get away clean..
No one... and i mean NO ONE wants to mess with a confused confusion creator... its commonly believed to be a highly contagious condition..
ive started forgetting words.. phrases.. thought flit in and out of my head like it was a sieve... none remain for very long... how old was i again...

the only thing keeping my memory in check is this little black book we got from these gentleman giving us Time Management Training.. I'd like to think that we all benefited from it somewhat but i have serious doubts. Undoubtedly that would be a bad thing...
anyhow... im hungry.. im usually hungry so thats a moot point... fact remains im hungry and i know whats for lunch... soup, chinese, kababs... theres something to look forward too..

My first thought for 2004 : "Life moves pretty fast... If you dont stop and take a look around... you could miss it... " Ferris Buellers Day off..
I have yet to hear truer words..
signing off...
Princess of the GemWorld

I dare to dream... so sue me.. :p
www.geocities.com/fariha_shah/GemWorld.html

Copyright © Fariha Shah 2004

I dare to dream... so sue me.. :p
www.geocities.com/fariha_shah/GemWorld.html

Copyright © Fariha Shah 2004