100 - Its finally a century

a century of what you ask?!.. This is my 100th post on this blog..

and its around the same time that i started blogging in the first place in 2003.. :) funny aint it..

i remember this time so well.. it was nearing new years the day i wrote my 1st blog... it was a slightly depressing time in my life as all decembers were apt to being.. the winter season has always traditionally been one of upheaval and irritation in general for me..

i dont like it.. i love the winters, but the whole upheaval part is something i can live without if you know what i mean.. i dont like psychosomatic stress.. it gives me psychosomatic diahrea.. which is not the nicest thing in the world if you know what i mean..

do you know what i mean.. i mean really.. do you..?
do you even care..
its been two years.. does any care out there..

sighhh... why should you.. what goes of your father anyhow..

as always close to new years i find my self slipping into the past.. reminiscing about the way things were.. and usually i only remembered the good times.. this time round i find myself also facing upto the not so good ones.. the mistakes we've made.. the heartaches we had.. the sadness that sometimes seemed to envelop our very being...

you may have noticed i talk in plural.. it because all my monumental moments in life were usually shared with my friends and family.. when i was little, my cousins were there all along... when i got older, Allah blessed me with some very lovely friends... the ones that were worth keeping are with me still..

I sometimes wonder.. *with this funny headache resounding in my head because i had to face sun exposure this morning, hence resulting in a slightly depressed and headachy state of mind in general... is this what life is supposed to be..

i know.. i know.. i keep coming full circle to this ageless question.. but somethimes i feel its good to sit back and REALLY look at your life and see what its all about.. sometimes when you feel life isnt making sense, dont make excuses for it.. either accept that you've screwed up somewhere and try to fix it.. or dont even think about it and go on as you are..

whats the worst that can happen anyway.. God has already ordained how much money you're going to get on your stay on earth.. and how much food you will eat. does that also mean its already ordained how much fat we'll have on our bodies.. no no no.. ahem.. God has also left the choice of whether or not to exercise upto us.. so inspite of the abundent availability of food, we also have the right to lose the fat.. easier said than done?! I KNOW!!

Personally i think its like a cat and mouse game. or a vicious circle. you eat, you get fat. you dont eat, you get depressed. you eat and exercise, you're a saint. which im not.. plus which when i get fat i also get depressed.. so im seriously screwed.

You have to love Allah Mian though.. hes got his ways.. i cant ever complain i didnt have enough to eat, wear or any scarcity of electronic gadgetry (my three main reasons for being).. i can however complain about the abundance of certain negatives in my life.. none of which i will mention..

some venting doesnt need to recorded on public blogs :)

oh well.. i'll be back.. i'll go crawl under my rock for a few days till i can come back out with my head in order.

tudeloo darlins

Princess of the GemWorld



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